As for yesterday, daeron pretty much said it all here.
Today, however, I had a Plan, involving many things around the house. I hung the towel rack. I sorted and put away the boxes of stuff that oidhche gave me when he dismantled his kitchen. I moved the microwave out of my car and into place in my kitchen. And then, I headed to IKEA, to buy the bookcases I've been talking about for months.
I remembered to measure my car before I left, to make sure they'd fit, and determined that I thought they would - just - although I hadn't considered the width, and I think it's possible that they wouldn't fit anyway. I didn't think to check the directions, since I've been there before, but I got there with no wrong turns this time. I even thought to check the shelves and making sure they were in stock before I pulled my cart around.
I couldn't move the damn box.
A kind gentleman even offered to help me get them onto the cart, and there were plenty of IKEA employees around who would have helped with that and with loading my car. I wouldn't have been able to get them out when I got home again. (As it turns out, I probably wouldn't have been able to get them in in the first place, so I guess it's just as well, but still...)
I am so angry and frustrated. I thought this would be simple. Instead, it appears to be impossible. I truly despise having to give up on things I really want because of my limitations. I drove home in tears. And now, I want to punch a wall, or destroy something.
ETA: Obviously it's not completely impossible to acquire the bookcases. What's impossible is doing it the way I wanted. I wanted to just go and do it myself, to actually accomplish something I wanted on my own. Instead, I will have to do rather a lot of planning and organizing, to rent a van, and to ask yet another favor I can't repay from one or more of my friends. All in all, instead of being a simple joy, it becomes a stressful burden. And that's what I'm angry and frustrated about, not the fairly straightforward events of the day.