Now the real story: demongrey and museasylum626's wedding was on Saturday. I took Friday off work, so I could be useful to them. I drove down to PA in the morning and got my hair cut, then reported for duty. We all headed out to Bryn Mawr for the rehearsal. The ceremony was supposed to be in an outdoor courtyard, which was a gorgeous venue, but it was cold and windy, and Saturday was expected to be the same. They made the decision to change to the rain site, which was inside the same building in their Great Hall. I know they were disappointed, but it was the right decision.
The rehearsal was frustrating, as expected. The people who really needed to walk through it and learn how it would work were the ones who didn’t bother to pay attention, or stop talking long enough to just get it done. We started late, and moving inside cost more time. I envied leftsphenoid and palingyuan, who were along as dates rather than participants and could just sit in the back away from all the crazy people.
Finally it ended, and everyone piled into cars and drove to dinner. Dinner was amazing. DG's mother did an excellent job of arranging something very nice indeed. She also proceeded to ply us with wine all night long. daernhelm declared that he wanted to marry his steak. Watching people eat their dessert was quite entertaining, because it was so good and so rich that you couldn't help but make happy faces. I'm not normally inclined to wax poetic about my food, but this was an incredible meal.
There were a handful of minor errands and questions that needed to be handled that evening, so I drove DG home and got everything accomplished along the way. I stayed to chat for half an hour or so, and played with the cats as well. I was pleased to get a little quiet time with him, since neither one of us has really had much available time to just hang out without everyone else in quite some time. The night before his wedding would not have been when I expected to find that time, so it was a pleasant surprise.
Saturday morning, I learned just how different wedding mornings are for the groomsmen than for the womenfolk. I'm used to getting up far too early after not enough sleep, and rushing all day long. For this one, since I was not part of the bridal party, I could take my time, have breakfast, and hang around. Meanwhile, the guys were just about thinking about getting ready when leftsphenoid and I left for Bryn Mawr.
Upon arrival, I put on my first (figurative) hat for the day: Onsite Event Coordinator. We put up signs, checked the space, and talked to the actual campus event coordinator, who got out more chairs and showed us where to find them. I called a student worker to fill in as an usher, since I didn't think the groomsmen would arrive on time. We waited for the florist. Both of us took calls from the wedding party, and LS ran upstairs to put out a few more chairs. I called the florist. I went up to set out the candles and programs and so on. The musicians arrived, and I put out more chairs for them. Someone locked the front door, so I had to find a way to prop it open. Finally the florist showed up and started setting up. I answered questions for all kinds of people. Guests started arriving, so I greeted guests - okay, mostly only my friends. The limos arrived, and as the men came in I sent them back to LS to get their flowers. I ran out to the women, and did six more last-minute things with them.
Back upstairs, I put on my second hat: Second Reader. This was my official role for the event, which gave me the literal front-row seat. The ceremony was short and to the point. The celebrant managed to narrowly avoid setting his robes on fire in the unity candle. His wife, who was the first reader, says he hasn't set himself on fire yet, but she's pretty sure there's a first time for everything. MA's little brother, the only child involved with the ceremony, behaved himself relatively well and did the things he was supposed to do.
2006 Life Events Score: Weddings 4, Funerals 2. With luck, that's a final tally.
My next hat for the day was that of Bellwether. Of fifteen people, I was the only one who knew where I was going - and I'd only driven it once, the night before, in the dark. I gave directions to those who knew the area and just needed a specific location, and those who I thought could follow verbal directions and make it on their own, so that we wouldn't have an eight-car caravan trying to stick together for half an hour. With only three cars following me directly, I was more comfortable, and brought everyone in safely.
At this point, I switched to the comfortable hat of Just A Guest, and enjoyed the party. Apparently this was my lucky day, since I won the centerpiece at my table (which I chose to leave behind) and also received a gift of hot salsa. Shame I didn't have a lottery ticket. The food was good, if not as impressive as the previous night, and pinkythemoose had done her usual exquisite work on the cakes. Then I danced the night away. I love dancing, and I don't get to do it very often, so I kept moving as long as there was music. I was so sore the next day, but it was a very good thing. Thanks again to daernhelm, blackfog, leftsphenoid, and talanos for dancing to the slow stuff with me.
Sunday morning, we all took it a little slow, but I took it slower than most. Of course, since I'd slept in the living room, I didn't have to go anywhere to socialize, which may explain why I stayed in bed so long. We watched another "turn off your brain" movie, Sahara.
Early in the afternoon, I put on a Chauffeur hat, and drove the newlyweds to the airport, since they were flying out of the airport near me. Then I returned home, to plunge into the joy of packing. I have only a few days left to pack up all my stuff and be ready to move. Yipe. 
 This comment has been omitted intentionally but may be reinstated at a later date.
 My reading actually included the phrase "of doom." I loved it.
 "Do you think they'll make it?"