Stephanie (collacentaur) wrote,

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So many questions, so little time...

calloocallay requested that I list the questions that I wish were asked frequently, and how could I disappoint her?

However, I'm not sure what to call them. Infrequently Asked Questions sounds good, but then it would be an iFAQ, and I'm not an Apple product. Not-So-Frequently Asked Questions works, but once I abbreviate that to NSFAQ, I wonder what it's not safe for. Antipodean Queens, perhaps? Argentine Quislings? Besides, while there are definitely a few NSFW questions that I'd like to be asked more often, I wasn't going to put them on the list. I'm selective about who I want asking. ;-)

Anyway, things I'd like to be asked more often:


Can I pay my bill?
Would you like to go home on time tonight?
Could I do some of your filing for you?
Can I make an appointment for mid-afternoon, mid-week, and no sooner than three weeks from now?
Would you like a cup of tea?
Will you please unplug or walk away from your phone, so that you can actually FOCUS?


Can I have a hug?
May I give you a massage?
Would you like a cup of tea?
When can I call you?
When can you come visit me/I come visit you? (And yes, I do hear this one frequently - but it's always good to know I'm wanted.)
Want to go see [movie/play/concert/something]?
Can I carry that for you?

...I think you get the gist of that series.

Hey, what did you think about X event that happened in Y [book/movie/TV show/news broadcast/social event/etc.]?

Have I ever told you I think you have an amazing [body part]? ;-)

This is starting to sound more like I'm writing Mad Libs than anything else.

And, as a special bonus, these I don't necessarily want to be asked frequently, but are ones I am surprised I don't get asked more often:

So what did you do in Egypt, anyway, other than be a tourist? Why was it a class?
Why do you read Harry Potter fanfiction? And/or Why is that your OTP? (And yes, calloocallay, I know you don't do fanfiction, full stop, but I'm occasionally surprised others don't ask.)

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