* Hey, lady. Look to your left. See those rows of white lines? The ones spaced, oh, a little wider than a car? Go put your car between them and turn it off – it's called "parking" – and get out of the intersection. Nobody runs in and out of a store this size in a small enough amount of time to wait for them where you are.
* Mr. Mortgage Banker, yes, I called you for your address. Believe it or not, there are people who don't have the zip code map of New York City memorized. Even people who live and work less than an hour away. If I were any farther away, I might not even have known that [pretentious address] meant NY, NY. Consider adding that one additional line to your signature file.
* WHY have my forearms been itchy at random intervals over the last six months? I would like to stop doing whatever makes it happen, but I have no idea.
* Yes, boss, I guard my lunch hour jealously. I'm your only full-time employee. I'm the only one here at 9:00, and I'm often the last one here in the evenings. You'd better believe I get growly when you are just getting started at 1:00 when I'm trying to go eat.
Things that make me happy:
* John, thank you for remembering the garbage and recycling last night. I completely forgot it was Tuesday until I heard you. You're awesome.
* Thank you to the friendly regular clients who make me feel like a real person. Some days I feel like an automaton at work, and invisible in the rest of my life. Today, you really made my day.
* I just called to schedule a haircut and got in for this Saturday. Usually I have to call more than 2 weeks ahead. Of course, I have to be there at 8 AM... (A, C, can I come down Friday night?)
* I'm going to the aquarium on Saturday July 17. Some of my friends might be coming with me. (Are you?) I hear they have penguins there.
* The heat and humidity are down today. It's a beautiful day. The upcoming weekend is a three-day weekend, and I have nothing planned other than the haircut. Really, life is good.