This isn't fun. Things I do in my free time, of my own accord, are supposed to be things I enjoy, aren't they?
Preparing for this upcoming game is making me miserable. I simply don't have the time or the energy to devote to this that other people seem to have. There is so much else going on right now, between work and Christmas the rest of life. And it's the time of year that keeping up energy levels becomes a challenge anyway. And this is requiring an incredible amount of preparation time for something that's only going to be a one-day game.
I don't want to give it up, though. I truly enjoy roleplaying, and find it to be relaxing. And it's nice to be able to leave myself behind. If I can just survive this character generation hell, it will be something that will make me happy.
But right now, it's just one more piece of stress and pressure bringing me remarkably close to the breaking point.
Preparing for this upcoming game is making me miserable. I simply don't have the time or the energy to devote to this that other people seem to have. There is so much else going on right now, between work and Christmas the rest of life. And it's the time of year that keeping up energy levels becomes a challenge anyway. And this is requiring an incredible amount of preparation time for something that's only going to be a one-day game.
I don't want to give it up, though. I truly enjoy roleplaying, and find it to be relaxing. And it's nice to be able to leave myself behind. If I can just survive this character generation hell, it will be something that will make me happy.
But right now, it's just one more piece of stress and pressure bringing me remarkably close to the breaking point.
- Current Mood:
stressed
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collacentaur- Stephanie
Comments
Didn't the holiday season used to be fun?
Besides, I have a good idea of what I want. I just don't have time to write down the full character background. And I despise the crunching numbers and forcing Word to do what I want for a usable character sheet, and I don't have time for that either - besides which, I did all the number part last night, and the computer ate it.