Stephanie (collacentaur) wrote,

Dear Amy:

Dear Amy:

The better I get to know you, the more inclined I am to put some faith in astrology. It's as good an explanation as any for two vastly different sets of experiences producing some remarkably similar attitudes, outlooks, and personality traits. In recent months, it seems like I hear a lot of echoes: echoes of your life appearing in mine, echoes of conversations we've had coming back in conversations with others. And while I think an outsider would be driven nuts by listening to us, with the way our conversations go round and round on the same few topics, I find it's useful to be able to return to a subject as new thoughts develop.

It is perhaps the similarities themselves that make the differences so pronounced. I don't usually feel compelled to enumerate and focus on the things that make me different from any other given person. I feel like I spend a lot of time just following your lead. That's okay for people like E&R, who I'm just getting to know. However, I don't want my existing friendships to become pale shadows of the ones you have. I do concentrate on making sure I assert my independence and my own personality. In the long run, that's a good thing, because the more attention I pay to what makes me unique, the better I come to know myself.

All of that aside, I want to thank you (and blackfog) for your continued support over the last year, as I have struggled to rediscover who I used to be, and to learn who I have become. It may sound strange to say that I think of your home as a place of quiet, calm and peace, but I truly do find it to be a refuge, where I can relax and be myself - and see just who and what that is.

When I mentioned that you were the next on my list to write about, you laughed and said "But we're not done yet." There's something to that. It gets harder and harder to write these, as they become more and more current. What I have to say to you bears little resemblance to what I would have said more than a year ago, when I started my project. I'm sure it bears equally little to what I would say a year from now. This is even more true for some of the people closer to the end of the list. The story isn't over, so it's hard to find a stopping place. I'm good with that.

Friendships don't last forever, at least not in the same form, and close-knit groups even less so. They have to shift and change with the individuals involved, or else they fall apart. You're always very open about freely acknowledging that at some point, we will not get along as well as we do right now. Things happen. It won't be the first time, nor most likely the last. I do hope, at very least, that we can remain a story that's not yet done, even when we become one that's not being told.
Tags: dear friends

  • (no subject)

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  • (no subject)

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  • Oops

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